Bet you never thought you’d see the Bible quoted in the Huffington Post!

The Bible (Luke 12.48) says: “From everyone to whom much has been given, much will be required.”

Chapter and verse, no less!

The Scripture-quoting fundamentalist, by the way, is Peter Dreier, E.P. Clapp Distinguished Professor of Politics at Occidental College in Los Angeles. Ever the helpful exegete, Dreier goes on to explain exactly what Jesus was talking about:

This is also the principle of progressive taxation.

Oh. I thought Jesus was talking about the moral obligation of people with special talents to use them in the service of God. I had no idea that the Savior was actually referring to the House health bill. Oh yes, He was!, explains Rev. Dreier:

As part of its health reform bill (HR 3200), the House has recommended a tax surcharge on the richest 1.3 percent of Americans – families with incomes over $350,000. The surcharge begins at 1 percent for families with incomes between $350,000 and $499,999; the surcharge applies only to the income over $350,000. It increases to 1.5 percent for families with incomes between $500,000 and $999,999. And it jumps to 5.4 percent for families with incomes over $1 million. This surcharge would raise $543 billion over the next ten years.

A married couple with an income of $351,000 would only pay an additional $10 in taxes (1% of the $1,000 over $350,000). A married couple with an income of $500,000 would pay an additional $1,500 in federal taxes. A married couple with an income of $1 million would only pay an extra $9,000. A married couple with a $2 million income would pay another $63,000 in taxes. This sounds like a lot to most Americans, but to the very rich, it is pocket change.

Pocket change? Easy for you to say, distinguished professor. The top 1 percent of earners already pay nearly one-third of all taxes collected in America. The top 5 percent pay half the taxes collected. But that’s okay, because Jesus says: Gouge them some more!

Strange–usually the HuffPost’s take on Bible-quoting Christians is more like this.